I'm sitting here with a strong cup of coffee (and I do mean strong, my husband made it, and he doesn't do anything halfway) watching my daughter sleep. Thanking God that my daughter is asleep after a long, fitful night with lots of interruptions and little rest.
It was one of those nights. You know, the kind you hear about and dread before you become a parent. The kind you dread as a mama because you never know when it's going to strike. You know they're coming; it's only a matter of time.
Maylin has been on a pretty regular sleep pattern at night since she was about 6 weeks, but last night was dreadful. I finally got her asleep in her swing (please no judgement from any of you Nazi mamas out there) for the last time at 4:00 AM, crawled into bed next to my husband, and fell into an exhausted sleep until 5:00 AM, at which time Michael's alarm went off.
It's funny though. As frustrated as I was with her in the dark, wee hours of the night, this morning everything was forgiven as I stood and gazed down at her peacefully dreaming away. Thus is the life of a mama, I suppose.
Last night, as I was bouncing and rocking and nursing and shushing, a Scripture came to mind that I continually prayed over Maylin:
"In peace I will both lie down and sleep, for You alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety."
And let's be honest, there was a lot of the "Lord, please make her go to sleep" kind of praying, too. I believe the combination of repeating God's words back to Him and the honesty of my own soul-cries are a powerful weapon to wield in the face of any struggle. I wanted Maylin to have a knowing deep in her being that she was cared for, loved, safe; that she could sleep with peace, with no fear; that Mama would always be there and so would her Heavenly Father. I think we all need that knowing every so often.
I'm so thankful the Lord is faithful to His promises, that He hears our prayers in the middle of the night when everyone else is asleep, that He deeply cares enough to respond in the secret places of our souls.
I'm also thankful for this cup of coffee and a swing that is rocking my daughter in her slumber as I type.
Here's to a bright and wonderful morning!
Scripture reference: Psalm 4:8 (ESV)
3 comments:
"God loves a lullaby in a mother's tears in the dead of night better than a hallelujah sometimes."
You're doing a great job. I'm proud that you're my wife and the mother of my child.
LOL! Oh my gosh, I've prayed those prayers, too: "Please, God, make this child go back to sleep!!!" And as aggravated as I get when she wakes me up, it's SO hard to stay mad when I look down in the crib and she just grins at me. I've told her if she weren't so cute, she'd be sleeping outside with the cat!
You are soooo not alone! And you are an awesome mama! Maylin is a very, VERY lucky little girl to have you and Michael as her parents.
Oh, girl! I hate to hear this! I am so impressed with your positive attitude...goes to show how good of a mama you are! Praying for a more restful night for the both you!
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