Back to Reality

You know, being an adult is hard. Why doesn't anyone ever tell you that being a grown-up is hard? Sometimes, I honestly don't know how I'm going to make it. I just find it glaringly ironic that I'm a college graduate and I have less money now than I ever have in my entire life. I'm reminded of that Martina McBride song...."This is for all you girls about 25, in little apartments just tryin' to get by, livin' on dreams and Spaghetti-Ohs, wonderin' where your life's gonna go....." I thought it was supposed to be easy. Cut and dry. Clear as day. I thought after I graduated and moved into the place called Adulthood that I would find a job with little to no problem doing exactly what I wanted to do and start rollin' in the big bucks. Then Reality knocked on my door and said, "Hi! Um. No, sorry. That's not exactly how it works. First you have to interview at a lot of places over a period of three months and just think you're going to get hired....but you really won't. And then when you finally do, they want you to start in three days. And it's not exactly what you want to do or had planned to do. Oh, and you're getting paid a little bit of money for a lot of hours, and that money comes once a month. And just for an extra kick, you get paid for August at the end of September and for September at the end of October, etc. Welcome! Glad you moved into the neighborhood!" And I'm left standing there with my mouth hanging open and a pie full of disillusionment. But, I guess this is the way that life goes. It won't be sunshine and flowers all the time. Even though in my world I think it should be. I actually do like my job. I like the kids. I like teaching them reading. I like getting experience that will aid me when I actually do become a teacher one day. And I'm very thankful that I was able, by no power of my own, to wedge my foot into the door of a school system that is extremely difficult to get into. I actually have it pretty good, in spite of all my half-hearted, humorous complaints. I mean, honestly, if I put things into a global, or eternal, perspective, I'm in the what, top 5% of the world? I'm extremely blessed. I have a house, a bed, a hot shower, indoor plumbing, warm clothes, a working car, a steady source of income; and I have Michael, Christy, my parents and grandparents, friends both near and far. I'm actually(wow, I use that word a lot!) ashamed of myself sometimes. I'm ashamed of how much I complain and worry, when I really have nothing to complain and worry about. The Lord has blessed me. He has blessed me so far and beyond what I deserve or am worthy of. And on top of His blessings, He has promised to provide for me, to strengthen me, and to care for me. He doesn't promise that I'll get what I want handed to me on a silver platter when I want it, and He doesn't say that it will always be easy, but He does promise to care for me. He doesn't have to do that. He does it because He loves me, which is absolutely mind-blowing. "Therefore, I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and is gone tomorrow, will He not much more clothe you, o you of little faith? Therefore, do not worry or say "What shall we eat?" or "What shall we drink?" or "What shall we wear?" For after all these things unbelievers seek. But your Heavenly Father knows that you need all of these things. So seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is it's own trouble." Matthew 6:25-34